I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
