Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
