So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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