I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
