yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
