Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
