Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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