every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize