Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
