Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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