I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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