Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
