Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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