is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
