He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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