he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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