we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i would punch a child for taco bell
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
