I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
