She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
