I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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