i already hear my dad disowning me
she smelled like a LAN party
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize