he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
