Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
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