i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
found the other keg... it's in the tree
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
