Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I'm like, not good at living.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize
