I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Randomize
