So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
You're earring is so big in my mouth
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
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