oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
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