Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
