So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize