She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
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