is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
