I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
