I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
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