consequently i now know what mace tastes like
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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