You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
