I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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