just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize