you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Let the clothes fall where they may.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
