it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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