thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize