you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Randomize
