what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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