She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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