I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
