I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
