I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
