I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
You are the jesus of drinking
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
