I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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