it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
How does one acquire holy water?
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize