i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
